Post by WigNosy on Jan 14, 2014 12:58:20 GMT -6
First off, let me say it is very good to have made some free agent signings so I have a pretty good feel for what this team is capable of now. Always nice to have the Brick House, Frank Brickowski, back for another year. Unquestioning loyalty from my players is extremely important to me, and Frank is a shining example of that among Hawks that hit the free agent market this year.
I felt I made what was a very fair offer to Kevin McHale, but when I saw what the 76ers were offering to pay him this season, I knew I wasn't about to pay him that kind of money and agreed that it would absolutely be in his best financial interest to make the move to Philadelphia. I will point out that it was hard for me to imagine in this financial climate paying a power forward a salary where his "millions per year" figure may exceed his "rebounds per game."
I was pleased, however, to find in free agency a slightly younger big man who has demonstrated similar ability to score in the person of Tom Chambers. While Tom was a fourth option on the Spurs last season, we think he has plenty left in the tank offensively and given that he exceeded Kevin's rebounding numbers in fewer minutes last season, I feel confident he'll be an effective replacement for Kevin. Also, he's coming at less than half what Bo spent on Kevin, and we all know old people like cheap stuff.
Also annoying was the Mavericks' poaching of Jerry Reynolds. Yeah, they offered him more cash, but it wasn't THAT much more. Jerry can't even use the excuse that he thought he'd be paired with another great point guard because the Mavericks had already dealt Stockton! I guess he wants to be "the man" on a tanking team instead of being "a cog" in a championship team. Good riddance, I say *coughing fit*. You in fhe firft row, pleafe gimme mah teef back.
Where was I? Oh yes, I am also happy to announce that we've brought in veteran Maurice Cheeks at the backup point guard spot. While I am very high on the future of Elliott Perry, Cheeks provides us another quality ballhandler for when Magic needs a rest, and is still a very intelligent perimeter defender. The hope in Atlanta is that Perry will focus his off-season regimen on defense and scoring to allow him to become an effective combo guard, as I think he has tremendous growth potential... and if he wants minutes, he's not getting them at Point.
After celebrating last year's championship (and tweeting what I now realize was an embarrassing selfie), I laid out a nice retirement spread for C James Edwards and SG Vinnie Johnson. While I would have been quite happy to bring them back for another season at a lucrative veteran minimum salary, they informed me that they had picked up their AARP cards at a team meeting earlier this season and were ready to be put out to stud. I am not entirely sure what they meant by that or what they expected... but on an unrelated note, if anyone is looking for an industrial-sized supply of glue for your office staff, I'm your man.
Their depatures paved the way for us to add power forwards Ed Pinckney, Kenny Gattison and C Brad Lohaus. Lohaus is a nice young center (well, young by our standards) who has shown a deft outside touch and who has proven he can score and rebound acceptably for a big. I have instructed our coaching staff to look for ways to mix him into the rotation as a so-called "stretch five." Pinckney and Gattison are journeyman bangers who give us expendable bigs with twelve hard fouls to flagrantly injure - I mean, play hard-nosed defense against - the likes of David Robinson and Karl Malone come playoff time. While I have great confidence in their abilities to step into the breach in case of injury - I wouldn't have signed them if I didn't - I made it clear to them that their roles on this team will consist mostly of fetching Gatorade for their teammates, picking up my dry cleaning when I can't be bothered, and taking out the knees of opposing superstars.
I haven't mentioned our returning core because what's to mention? They won me another title last season, so they're really good. What else do you want? As for our rookie, Lloyd Daniels, I told our scouts to draft him after seeing him in that Dumb and Dumber movie. I thought he was hilarious opposite Drew Carey in that movie and I know Drew Carey is now coaching the Price is Right. Or is it hosting the Price is Right? I dunno... it's all I have to look forward to in daytime TV anymore, ever since they took Press Your Luck off the air. My great-grandkids tell me they have them Whammies on cable TV or satellite TV or some such voodoo, but you can keep your communist 39,403 channels. When I was a kid, radio only had three channels and that was how we liked it. It was hard enough adjusting to the invention of them thar TV in my 50's and when I was a kid, remote control was called "rocks." You threw a rock at your sister's head and told her to change the channel.
Anyway, it's almost 2:30 pm now, which means it's time for me to gum my tv dinner and go to bed. Hurry up with your questions then get off my lawn so I can sleep.
I felt I made what was a very fair offer to Kevin McHale, but when I saw what the 76ers were offering to pay him this season, I knew I wasn't about to pay him that kind of money and agreed that it would absolutely be in his best financial interest to make the move to Philadelphia. I will point out that it was hard for me to imagine in this financial climate paying a power forward a salary where his "millions per year" figure may exceed his "rebounds per game."
I was pleased, however, to find in free agency a slightly younger big man who has demonstrated similar ability to score in the person of Tom Chambers. While Tom was a fourth option on the Spurs last season, we think he has plenty left in the tank offensively and given that he exceeded Kevin's rebounding numbers in fewer minutes last season, I feel confident he'll be an effective replacement for Kevin. Also, he's coming at less than half what Bo spent on Kevin, and we all know old people like cheap stuff.
Also annoying was the Mavericks' poaching of Jerry Reynolds. Yeah, they offered him more cash, but it wasn't THAT much more. Jerry can't even use the excuse that he thought he'd be paired with another great point guard because the Mavericks had already dealt Stockton! I guess he wants to be "the man" on a tanking team instead of being "a cog" in a championship team. Good riddance, I say *coughing fit*. You in fhe firft row, pleafe gimme mah teef back.
Where was I? Oh yes, I am also happy to announce that we've brought in veteran Maurice Cheeks at the backup point guard spot. While I am very high on the future of Elliott Perry, Cheeks provides us another quality ballhandler for when Magic needs a rest, and is still a very intelligent perimeter defender. The hope in Atlanta is that Perry will focus his off-season regimen on defense and scoring to allow him to become an effective combo guard, as I think he has tremendous growth potential... and if he wants minutes, he's not getting them at Point.
After celebrating last year's championship (and tweeting what I now realize was an embarrassing selfie), I laid out a nice retirement spread for C James Edwards and SG Vinnie Johnson. While I would have been quite happy to bring them back for another season at a lucrative veteran minimum salary, they informed me that they had picked up their AARP cards at a team meeting earlier this season and were ready to be put out to stud. I am not entirely sure what they meant by that or what they expected... but on an unrelated note, if anyone is looking for an industrial-sized supply of glue for your office staff, I'm your man.
Their depatures paved the way for us to add power forwards Ed Pinckney, Kenny Gattison and C Brad Lohaus. Lohaus is a nice young center (well, young by our standards) who has shown a deft outside touch and who has proven he can score and rebound acceptably for a big. I have instructed our coaching staff to look for ways to mix him into the rotation as a so-called "stretch five." Pinckney and Gattison are journeyman bangers who give us expendable bigs with twelve hard fouls to flagrantly injure - I mean, play hard-nosed defense against - the likes of David Robinson and Karl Malone come playoff time. While I have great confidence in their abilities to step into the breach in case of injury - I wouldn't have signed them if I didn't - I made it clear to them that their roles on this team will consist mostly of fetching Gatorade for their teammates, picking up my dry cleaning when I can't be bothered, and taking out the knees of opposing superstars.
I haven't mentioned our returning core because what's to mention? They won me another title last season, so they're really good. What else do you want? As for our rookie, Lloyd Daniels, I told our scouts to draft him after seeing him in that Dumb and Dumber movie. I thought he was hilarious opposite Drew Carey in that movie and I know Drew Carey is now coaching the Price is Right. Or is it hosting the Price is Right? I dunno... it's all I have to look forward to in daytime TV anymore, ever since they took Press Your Luck off the air. My great-grandkids tell me they have them Whammies on cable TV or satellite TV or some such voodoo, but you can keep your communist 39,403 channels. When I was a kid, radio only had three channels and that was how we liked it. It was hard enough adjusting to the invention of them thar TV in my 50's and when I was a kid, remote control was called "rocks." You threw a rock at your sister's head and told her to change the channel.
Anyway, it's almost 2:30 pm now, which means it's time for me to gum my tv dinner and go to bed. Hurry up with your questions then get off my lawn so I can sleep.